Do you ever get like this. You are married for years, maybe decades, and yet you find out something about your spouse that shocks you.
You can’t imagine the chaos leading up to this healthy, darling heart-shaped kale frittata. Superbowl Sunday led to some frantic last minute baking when I decided we had to have red velvet cheesecake cupcakes and angel food cake on top of the soup and guacamole that was on the menu. I admit I always bite off more than I can chew when it comes to special food day events.
This only meant one thing. I needed a little help in the kitchen and asked Mr. ST to please help me with a few things because I was chopping vegetables for the soup, peeling shrimp, whipping cream cheese and if he could just help me for five minutes, I might not lose my mind. He was happy to help and that’s when two tiny mistakes turned our day upside down.
The Cupcake Wars
“I don’t understand why my cake is not getting red. Did you put the two tablespoons of red food color in the buttermilk?” I asked. “Yes, I put two of these.” What? That’s not a tablespoon; that is a teaspoon? Don’t tell me you don’t know the difference.” His answer, “I am not a culinary expert.” First I gave the crazy lady look to a very surprised man. Then my mind quickly raced to an internal question I asked myself. How did I not know this about him. And, isn’t it just like a man to mistake something smaller for something larger. There are jokes about this.
After a bit of ranting about why men can put complicated electronics together without an owner’s manual and not know the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon, the best I could come back with to prove that it was necessary for any living human being to know the difference in these measurements was “don’t you ever have to take cough syrup?” It was such a desperate question as I tried to prove my point that people need to know about measurements and it has nothing to do with being a culinary expert. To this and my crazy lady face, he looked even more perplexed. In his mind, teaspoon tablespoon, what’s the big deal and why is he supposed to know about it.
For a minute, I didn’t know who this man who says he’s my husband was. And, for a minute, he didn’t know who this woman who says she’s his wife was.
What else am I going to find out about the person I have spent over 4500 days being married to?
It was so funny that I quickly forgave him, granted a stay for the batter, and baked the cupcakes anyway. They turned a nice chocolate color away from purple and were quite delicious. But, a few minutes later…
The Fallen Angel Food Cake
Just as I was getting over that, I asked him if he would help me do one more thing. I needed a dozen eggs to be separated. “Please put one egg white at a time in a small bowl and transfer each egg white to a larger bowl, in case a yolk breaks. I went about getting the rest of everything ready and then I heard the sound of disaster yet again.
I turned around and there it was. The big splash of yellow into eleven egg whites. The look on his face was priceless. Using our handy dandy, now deemed worthless egg separator, he said, “it just slipped right through.” And the part about using a small bowl for each egg to avoid such a thing was never heard. He felt betrayed by the promise of that little tool that was supposed to keep that yolk from slipping. He just kept staring into the bowl of whites with that one egg yolk that looked like a splash of paint on white carpet.
Normally, I do laugh at these kinds of things. I do have perspective in life. But, it seemed too much gone wrong in too short of a time. Five minutes ago I lost the red in my red velvet cake and now I’ve lost a dozen room temperature egg whites. I have to blame myself for the egg white mess. He makes his living knowing how technology works, and understands very complicated geek stuff far above my head. I’m not equipped to play with all the wires hanging from our media system and he’s not in his words, “a culinary expert.”
So how did our day turn out? The cupcakes were a smashing success in spite of being brown and not red. We made the angel food cake with eggs I tried to force to room temperature and it flopped. People still ate it and didn’t seem to notice it wasn’t very good. It never rose and had a stiff consistency, but it wasn’t the end of anyone’s world. This was a day that made me think on an even deeper level about perspective and maintaining grace under fire or how easy it is to slip up in that area.
Mr. ST completely redeemed himself by making his legendary guacamole which disappeared faster than anything else made that day. And we are still happily married with a new realization that we must limit our time in the kitchen to eating and drinking together. We’ve had enough crazy lady faces and surprises for a while.
Tell me, have you ever discovered something about your spouse that shocked you when it comes to food or cooking?
I couldn’t throw those 12 eggs out, and the very next morning they became this kale and green olive frittata, ironically cut into heart shapes which says we survived our kitchen troubles. The chaos of Sunday was quite redeemed, when garlic, kale and olive oil hit the frying pan.
Kale, considered even healthier than spinach, is a super food and a wonderful vegetable to add to quiche, or frittata, because it continues to hold its own and is a compliment to many different flavors.
Saute a little garlic in olive oil. Remove garlic and add in the kale. Remove ribs first, but no need to chop it up. It looks pretty left alone.
Add in about a dozen eggs which have been beaten with a little pecorino or parmesan, and some sliced Spanish olives.
Bake for about twenty minutes at 350 degrees. Serve immediately or at room temperature.
- olive oil
- 2 garlic cloves
- 1 bunch of kale
- 4 large Spanish olives, sliced
- 12 eggs, beaten
- 1 tablespoon freshly grated parmesan or pecorino cheese
- sea salt
- freshly ground pepper
- Preheat oven to 350.
- Saute garlic cloves in olive oil. Remove. Add in kale and saute just until wilted.
- Transfer to baking dish. Add olive slices.
- Add cheese to beaten eggs. Season with salt and pepper.
- Pour mixture over kale.
- Bake for about 20 minutes or until the eggs are set.